She married him because she is an idiot.

[pipi_k]

44. This is one of those issues

that, for me, is extremely frustrating because I can see both sides.

I grew up in an abusive home. My father laid his hands on my mother loads of times, and she herself wasn't above throwing a pan of hot soup or something else at him.

As an adult, I got involved with a series of abusive men.

I know all the tricks they pull to get their victims to stay, and I know how difficult it is for a woman with kids to leave, especially if she doesn't have a job or career of her own.

And I know all about the "But I looooooove him!" thing.

I know all that.

But in each case, for some unknown reason, I was able to find the strength to leave...even with small children.


So while I understand the reasons for staying, I also want to shake those women and tell them that they have to love themselves more than they "love" their abusers.

and if they have children, all the more important it is for them NOT to expose the kids to any kind of domestic violence.

Being a child in a violent home was, IMO, worse than being the adult in the same circumstances. It did irreparable damage.

The kids are always the real victims in those relationships.

Oh, and if someone chooses to try and "work it out", there has to be real effort. Like anger management and marriage counseling. No counseling = no marriage, as far as I'm concerned.