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[TorchTheWitch]

254. I've wasted far too much time on social assistance that doesn't exist

When you have no kids, aren't pregnant or have a drug or alcohol problem tough shit for you. My county has NEVER had much of anything in the way of social assistance, and every person is forced to deal with the county of where they reside. Had I happened to live in Philadelphia County there is a lot more in teh way of social assistance, but since I don't it's not available to me.

This is exactly the kind of crap I had to find out the hard way and never WANTED to do, but my family convinced me it was my only hope... that was before they told me they would do nothing else for me. I didn't want to waste one minute of m time with any social services and just get a damn job. The Community Action Agency USED to have a program that helped only employed persons with re-housing due to eviction with help for finding a place, help paying security deposit and first month's rent as well as moving expenses, but they ran out of money and are scrambling to just continue to help those peopel that were already in the program. There is no service that helps keep anyone off the street other than the shelter that is woefully inadeqite and why it is continually full with a long waiting list. Other people considered more "needy" than me get bumped ahead of me for the shelter... people with children, that are pregnant, have drug or alcohol problems, AIDS, brian injury or other debilitating mental condition, elderly, etc.

The shelter itself is terrible. They lock the doors every night at 8pm, so you can't have an evening or night job. They serve one meal a day that is open to the homeless and is whatever it is that's been donated. Too bad for me with my food allergies and food restrictions because of my medication. For other meals you're on your own. There is no kitchen or laundry facilities. You can only have a shower twice a week using a community bar of soap provided no one has stolen it. There is no way to secure any of your possessions, nor to even secure your own person when you sleep. There are no guards. Theft and other violence is rampant, and you are stuck in there with alcoholics, drug addicts, mental incompetants, and all other "dregs". It houses both sexes. I'm sure we've all been long familiar with the horrors of homeless shelters and why so many homeless prefer to live on the street because they feel safer. I'd rather be dead than lose everything and have to face existing in it even if I could get in since my case worker never put me on the waiting list as my family insisted. They imagine that it's Disneyland even after I gave them the link to the shelter's own website that spells out many of these things though of course it doesn't mention how vulnerable you and whatever you bring with you are. Like hell I'd go there. I'd rather be dead.

There is also a women's shelter, but it's only for women with kids, pregnant women and victims of domestic violence. Just being female can't get you in it. At 50 years old I should try to get myself knocked up just so I could get in there? The fertility ship sailed over a year or two ago. I'd never do it anyway. Pregnancy is nothing I've ever wanted, and dangerous with my medication. How in the world could anyone willfully bring a child into the world they can't care for and when they can't even care for themselves anymore? Women do it all the time though.

My neighbors have swam the gauntlet of social services from physical or mental complete inability to function as a normal person, domestic abuse, child services, welfare, NHS and Community Action which is all there is. There is no more Section 8 housing available in this county anymore either as some time ago they filled the quota whatever that is. That was something else my case worker was supposed to do is get me on the list for Section 8. She didn't.

We've all beefed here about how crappy social services are in this country. You have NO idea just how bad they are until you try to get what puny services there are. That all by itself is terrifying to discover. Worse than that, it's impossible to just get someone on the phone. When you finally do they tell you certain things but the next person you talk to tells you different, and on and on until you have no idea what information is correct or if any of it is. How do you trust any social service agency that does that? And they ALL do it inclduing legal aid that is one of the worst. If you don't ASK them something specific they won't tell you what things you can do that you don't know about. NO ONE at legal aid told me about the pauper petition, and I only found out about it by accident though I didn't know what all it did and had to find that out the hard way. Sooooo many things I've thought were a certain way that turned out not to be later. The pauper petition was the ONLY way I've been able to file ANYTHING with the court because the court fees are enormous and normally paid by law firms with plenty of money. Just to file the appeal I was expected to be able to pay a fee of $285.50. Had I not found out about it that legal aid didn't tell me about though I TOLD them I couldn't possibly afford the filing fees I never would have tried to file the appeal and would have been on the street back in March when it was still as cold as it was during the winter. I would have been thrown out of here in that weather. The court clerks aren't ALLOWED to tell you a lot of things because it's considered giving legal advise and they get fired for that. They do at least hint in such a way that you can figure out things yourself sometimes.

Everything I've had to do I had to do myself while finding things out the hard way. I had to spend more time researching things and burning my phone up making continual calls that I couldn't trust what I was being told, and just get scammed and run in circles. Every one of my neighbors that have had to deal with all these same and much more services have said the same, but they only ever told me these things long after the fact.

The ship sailed a while ago. I don't even know why I'm still fighting other than if I stop then what do I do? Just sit and wait till they come to throw me out and take everything I have and everything that means anything to me?

I would not even wish this on my scumlord. Though if she was standing on the sidewalk while a giant bus was headed her way, I'd give her a shove.