Fat "acceptance" - from the PoV of a fat person

[laundry_queen]

41. Damn right and my oldest 2 children are an obvious example

I'm obese. I've always struggled with my weight - as a teen I stayed normal weight b/c my parents tried to shame and starve me into staying a normal weight. I skipped meals, exercised excessively (we're talking 3-4 hours a day) etc. When I met my now-ex H he was the first one to not care about my weight. He told me to stop worrying about food because it stressed him out (he was naturally thin and never had to think about it) So I did, I cooked his favorites, and I gained weight and he didn't care (which was so novel for me, weight was all my parents ever cared about, both of them being naturally thin didn't understand why I was 'thick' as a child).

Our first child was very thin, just like my ex. She was a skinny baby, so skinny that every doctor we saw was concerned about her weight. They were always telling me to fatten her up with cream and oil, lol. "her head is too big for her body" I was told. I thought, she's very healthy and she's breastfed, so she must be the weight she was meant to be, why would I want to feed her extra stuff she doesn't need? She was in the 5th percentile on the growth chart when she was 10 months old. She barely at solids at that point, even though I tried. She just would pick at them. She loved Cheerios though, lol.

My second child was pudgy from the start. She was slow to start, but gained weight like crazy by 6 months old. She was well over the 100th percentile on the growth charts on breastmilk alone. The weird thing is she ate less than baby #1 did, only every 4-6 hours from birth (oldest was every 1.5 hours till she was 1, lol). She also started on solids very late. Every doctor, except my family doctor who knew me well, talked to me about trying to get her to not weigh so much. I was like, seriously? All this kid is eating is breastmilk, she's happy and healthy, wtf?? After what I went through with baby #1, I was just fucking exasperated with the medical community at this point. No wonder people become obsessed about their weight, it starts so young.

Anyhow my older two girls are 3 years apart. As they grew up, people thought they were twins because they were so close in size, lol. My oldest is now almost 19 and has turned into a skinny, junk food eating couch potato. I doubt she weighs 110 lbs soaking wet, she wears a size 0-2. My 2nd daughter is almost 16 and is quite large, and much taller as well (she has 2 inches on me, 3 inches on her older sister). She's about a size 12-14. She eats salads all the time, and exercises constantly (she likes sports and is on some sports teams, she likes to bike around town, and enjoys running).

They were like that FROM BIRTH. I wish I could scan in (you know the days before digital cameras) pictures of each of them at a year. One has ribs showing, the other one looks like the michelin man. My younger 2 daughters (yes 4 total) are somewhere in between the 2 genetic extremes.

My dad's family is Ukrainian, and they come from an area of Ukraine that was constantly at war (it changed hands 3 times in their lives before they came to Canada). I have no doubt my ancestors were probably starved at some point. And with the genes I had, my parents did exactly the wrong things for me as a child - high carb all the time, low fat, formula fed etc and I think that's why I have issues. No one else in my extended family has the same issues (I was the only one who was formula fed, interestingly enough and soy formula at that). Oh, and I had antibiotics constantly as a child - for every sniffle. My gut microbia was likely destroyed. Add to that my mom's eating disordered thinking, and her manipulating me with food and, well, it's no surprise I'm obese. It was a recipe on how to make an obese adult actually. But it started with genetics, imo. And the proof is my 2 oldest daughters.