General Discussion

Ms. Toad

(38,055 posts)

183. Whether your face shows it or not, you are sneering.

Mon Jun 6, 2016, 06:33 AM

Jun 2016

Believe me, people feel your "stony" visage in the same way they experience a literal sneer. Different people react to and cope with the aftermath trauma differently. For me, weight was the only longstanding impact - it is not an excuse, it was my mind/body's subconscious way of letting me cope for two decades. The reality is that any habit nurtured for over half of my life is hard to break.You might want two consider where your disproportionate emotional reaction is coming from.

But go on sitting on your high horse judging the rest of the world, since it seems you enjoy the spot. Just know that it is not a helpful place to be because, as the OP pointed out, that judgment helps reinforce the very cycle that disgusts you.

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Highlight:

Fat "acceptance" - from the PoV of a fat person [View all] nadine_mn Jun 2016 OP

K&R !!!!! n/t RKP5637 Jun 2016 #1

Some of it may be the body trying to protect people against toxic stuff in the environment Baobab Jun 2016 #13

You're right spinbaby Jun 2016 #24

a great many chemicals in the environment, not just a few, and they ae building up rapidly. Baobab Jun 2016 #25

There are a lot of misconceptions about fat out there that aren't helping, either arithia Jun 2016 #27

Very true And coincidentally dementia has risen! Silver_Witch Jun 2016 #97

IR does not cause weight gain. Feron Jun 2016 #137

Thank you. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #2

long-time defender of overweight people here Skittles Jun 2016 #3

Addictions liberalmike27 Jun 2016 #103

Well, you can't stop drinking, either. Marr Jun 2016 #113

That is bullshit. Drahthaardogs Jun 2016 #124

The fact that somebody else can eat three Big Macs at one sitting crim son Jun 2016 #127

Yep, I've seen the same thing. Marr Jun 2016 #131

First of all Drahthaardogs Jun 2016 #134

No it isn't. Marr Jun 2016 #133

Then you know that genetics play a huge role. Drahthaardogs Jun 2016 #135

I'm the same way. Marr Jun 2016 #138

Yes, but there is this too Drahthaardogs Jun 2016 #140

The more I read about sugar addiction, the more I wish nadine_mn Jun 2016 #139

Great post. We have strict social rules against deriding people for their race, their gender, rhett o rick Jun 2016 #4

The need people have to tear down others nadine_mn Jun 2016 #8

You're absolutely right! meow2u3 Jun 2016 #21

Excellent post, nadine! brer cat Jun 2016 #5

Live and let live! mdbl Jun 2016 #6

^ cagefreesoylentgreen Jun 2016 #7

what an amazing story nadine_mn Jun 2016 #11

wow, great story Fast Walker 52 Jun 2016 #16

He can still have his ice cream.. Feron Jun 2016 #148

Ignore the blamers. They blame the poor for being poor, the sick for being sick, etc. Live and Learn Jun 2016 #9

I agree, it's so they can boost their own self esteem oregonjen Jun 2016 #120

Keep Up The Good Work! Dems to Win Jun 2016 #10

just read a book - Body of Truth KT2000 Jun 2016 #12

I had a family member Texasgal Jun 2016 #18

how sad KT2000 Jun 2016 #44

Thank you for the information. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #32

That sounds like an interesting book laundry_queen Jun 2016 #34

and I know that hurts KT2000 Jun 2016 #43

Wow, that's crazy laundry_queen Jun 2016 #52

"an overweight person is a visible assault on their self-image" nadine_mn Jun 2016 #78

Mothers and daughters! KT2000 Jun 2016 #112

Diabetes 2 increases greatly with weight gain TexasMommaWithAHat Jun 2016 #102

While This is True liberalmike27 Jun 2016 #104

Probably Due To liberalmike27 Jun 2016 #105

It is actually less true than we are led to believe. Ms. Toad Jun 2016 #153

Severely underweight people are often that way due to serious illness. Marr Jun 2016 #114

the stats beg further research KT2000 Jun 2016 #116

It most certainly has been born out by the research. Marr Jun 2016 #129

you said being overweight KT2000 Jun 2016 #170

I'd like to see some kind of study that proves that passiveporcupine Jun 2016 #122

Of course being thin doesn't, in and of itself, mean that you're healthy. Marr Jun 2016 #130

great post-- it is really clarifying! Fast Walker 52 Jun 2016 #14

Fat acceptance means saying I'm not a worthless, ugly piece of shit or that I should just die. aikoaiko Jun 2016 #15

Well said... Wounded Bear Jun 2016 #17

Not all food is equal. U cant eat too much of some. ErikJ Jun 2016 #19

I'm glad you are able to stick to your healthly diet passiveporcupine Jun 2016 #29

Well if u are in tremendous emotional distress I agree. ErikJ Jun 2016 #160

I think you've missed the entire point here. Texasgal Jun 2016 #30

That is nice and I agree, but SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #33

That whoosh sound is the whole post meaning going past you Logical Jun 2016 #61

I eat a constant diet of junk food and have never been overweight Skittles Jun 2016 #67

Must be free range and firm junk food. AtheistCrusader Jun 2016 #108

That's because... awoke_in_2003 Jun 2016 #109

your internal anger burns calories. i have a little bit of that but nothing like you... JanMichael Jun 2016 #125

Well you probably will be or are diabetic then. ErikJ Jun 2016 #156

sorry to disappoint you Skittles Jun 2016 #159

So youre not even hypoglycemic yet? ErikJ Jun 2016 #161

nope Skittles Jun 2016 #162

Low blood pressure can be a symptom of hypoglycemia ErikJ Jun 2016 #163

sorry to disappoint again! Skittles Jun 2016 #164

U cant fool mother nature ErikJ Jun 2016 #165

everyone develops something "sooner or later" Skittles Jun 2016 #166

Congratulations. If u eat only junk food and are still ErikJ Jun 2016 #167

my coworkers who are obsessed with health eating are constantly falling asleep Skittles Jun 2016 #168

Yes exercise is important. But how do u even maintain regular bowel movements ErikJ Jun 2016 #169

lol, I do eat a lot of popcorn and potato chips Skittles Jun 2016 #171

Well if u'r telling the truth youre very lucky and more power to ya. ErikJ Jun 2016 #173

check out this stat Skittles Jun 2016 #174

Maybe you just don't have the whole story Warpy Jun 2016 #177

Bullshit. AtheistCrusader Jun 2016 #107

lol. Not as simple as that. Calories is NOT calories. ErikJ Jun 2016 #158

That is A factor in managing weight yes. AtheistCrusader Jun 2016 #188

Thank you for sharing these insights. spooky3 Jun 2016 #20

Great post! nt MadDAsHell Jun 2016 #22

*long clap* arithia Jun 2016 #23

There does seem to be some genetic component to it ErikJ Jun 2016 #26

Damn right and my oldest 2 children are an obvious example laundry_queen Jun 2016 #41

Very interesting. kag Jun 2016 #106

I am a very large man who has competed in powerlifting for thirty years. Drahthaardogs Jun 2016 #56

Many idiots on the DU love making fun of Christies weight, etc. Disgusting. Should be banned IMO. Logical Jun 2016 #28

I alerted on every one I saw... awoke_in_2003 Jun 2016 #110

Good idea, thanks for this. Anyone's appearance should not be a topic of insult. nt Logical Jun 2016 #117

Esp when there are soooo many real reasons to criticize him nadine_mn Jun 2016 #141

Sorry... no sympathy for Christie. harrose Jun 2016 #142

*sigh* Texasgal Jun 2016 #150

This message was self-deleted by its author Logical Jun 2016 #154

Condeming body-shaming has NOTHING to do with sympathy for Christie. Ms. Toad Jun 2016 #155

Thank you Nadine, passiveporcupine Jun 2016 #31

Thank you, passiveporcupine. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #35

Awww...thanks Susan passiveporcupine Jun 2016 #38

They have studied yo-yo vs obesity and yo-yo was much, much more damaging. jeff47 Jun 2016 #69

Ha! That's what I always suspected. nt SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #89

Thank you for your support and kind words nadine_mn Jun 2016 #37

Thanks sweetie. Same for you! passiveporcupine Jun 2016 #39

exercise, exercise, exercise Angel Martin Jun 2016 #63

I agree (based on my experience only) if you can do enough that you enjoy. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #92

A lot of people have their own demons, whether tom_kelly Jun 2016 #36

thank you, nadine_mn - your post hopemountain Jun 2016 #40

People don't realize this: Manifestor_of_Light Jun 2016 #42

Don't Diet / Eat Healthy Food ONLY scottie55 Jun 2016 #46

Diet is a bad word NobodyHere Jun 2016 #50

Diet Means Going Without - Going Hungry In Most People's Minds scottie55 Jun 2016 #66

I looked him up NobodyHere Jun 2016 #71

I don't like that the word diet has changed from... Pacifist Patriot Jun 2016 #119

When you eat fewer calories than normal, your body thinks you are starving. Manifestor_of_Light Jun 2016 #149

That's what most people assume it means due to the way it's used Major Nikon Jun 2016 #172

Well while we're on proper word meaning NobodyHere Jun 2016 #176

True, but I'm not sure that context is all that relevant outside a laboratory setting Major Nikon Jun 2016 #187

Well if you tried living on a 2000 calorie/day diet NobodyHere Jun 2016 #191

has anyone thought about the glowing TV food ads? raging moderate Jun 2016 #47

They Are Brainwashing Us To Eat Poison scottie55 Jun 2016 #48

Yep. nt SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #53

Thank you for a very interesting post. I'm sorry for your issues. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #55

Hi, thyroids are very sensitive to radiation and it's estimated that 1/3 of americans have an under uppityperson Jun 2016 #60

Well, I grew up smack dab in the middle of the nuclear test era, so maybe that's it. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #62

My mother had the same disease I had at the same age. Manifestor_of_Light Jun 2016 #68

Wow, what scary symptoms. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #88

Dieting Is Deadly - Eating Healthy Is The ONLY Answer scottie55 Jun 2016 #45

Absolutely true. Been saying for years. Thanks for posting video support (only watched a bit so far) Bernardo de La Paz Jun 2016 #77

Thank you for this Tien1985 Jun 2016 #49

K&R Solly Mack Jun 2016 #51

Well worth the read for everyone that comes to this site....I hope your words alter AuntPatsy Jun 2016 #54

Bookmarked, BTW. Thank you (and responders) again. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #57

I was struck by this thought in your post mnhtnbb Jun 2016 #58

Pretty much my depression and weight go hand in hand nadine_mn Jun 2016 #80

I am so sorry to hear about your kitty. mnhtnbb Jun 2016 #83

I'm sorry for your loss. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #94

Maybe, its hard for me to relate though. DemMomma4Sanders Jun 2016 #59

Try hating the corporations that are pushing it. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #64

I do, i do. I tell people as much as possible to the point of seeming overzealous DemMomma4Sanders Jun 2016 #121

The "self aborbed child abuser" may just be uninformed or doing the best they can nadine_mn Jun 2016 #143

Let me give you another perspective. Ms. Toad Jun 2016 #157

Your life experience is anything but average. DemMomma4Sanders Jun 2016 #178

Here comes the calvary Dorian Gray Jun 2016 #182

Whether your face shows it or not, you are sneering. Ms. Toad Jun 2016 #183

There is no high horse. There are wrong, destructive ways to raise a child DemMomma4Sanders Jun 2016 #184

Shame is NEVER productive. Ms. Toad Jun 2016 #186

I can tell you this, nadine ... pacalo Jun 2016 #65

I am an overweight person, also. I might have been able to lose it demigoddess Jun 2016 #70

You sound like an amazingly tough woman. dawg Jun 2016 #85

You are such an amazing woman nadine_mn Jun 2016 #145

I'v also seen her do things that would make any mother d**m proud!!! demigoddess Jun 2016 #192

When someone (usually my brother) comments on my weight TexasBushwhacker Jun 2016 #72

I am always tempted to look around in surprise nadine_mn Jun 2016 #81

It is so incredibly rude for them to do that. SusanCalvin Jun 2016 #96

Excellent post! JNelson6563 Jun 2016 #73

Great post, Nadine ! Keep fighting the fight, one day it will all click in place OnDoutside Jun 2016 #74

Rec & Kick. MerryBlooms Jun 2016 #75

Cool post. Fat takes a long time to add and should take a long time to come off. Bernardo de La Paz Jun 2016 #76

K&R Scuba Jun 2016 #79

Thanks for this important discussion... FailureToCommunicate Jun 2016 #82

We're all just people-have a great Sunday! jalan48 Jun 2016 #84

Please don't feel bad about your weight. athena Jun 2016 #86

Thank you nadine_mn Jun 2016 #146

Excellent post. dawg Jun 2016 #87

Having been hypothyroid and subject to weight swings since adolescence, I sympathize completely. Surya Gayatri Jun 2016 #90

I was 50-60 pounds overweight for a long time. CrispyQ Jun 2016 #91

I had been morbidly obese FlaGranny Jun 2016 #93

I had lost about 40 lbs nadine_mn Jun 2016 #98

A senior class FlaGranny Jun 2016 #100

you is what you is! retrowire Jun 2016 #95

Thanks so much for posting this. Obesity runs in my family. emulatorloo Jun 2016 #99

Here's an additional thing worth looking into. nolabear Jun 2016 #101

I can't say I know how you feel, because I've never faced that daily. merrily Jun 2016 #111

I retired from nursing Runningdawg Jun 2016 #115

I am so sorry - I have been lucky to have a doctor nadine_mn Jun 2016 #147

Great post. Vinca Jun 2016 #118

Wow! Bigredhunk Jun 2016 #123

I know this struggle MFM008 Jun 2016 #126

We can be an uncaring, sorry, hurtful lot, no better than Dustlawyer Jun 2016 #128

Back in the late 1940s 1939 Jun 2016 #136

I'm sorry for the hurt you have had to endure. Dustlawyer Jun 2016 #152

Well, thank you for the words 1939 Jun 2016 #180

K&R Lithos Jun 2016 #132

Can I give you some honest advice? Prism Jun 2016 #144

I agree discipline is very important NobodyHere Jun 2016 #151

Good post KentuckyWoman Jun 2016 #175

You can do it...and here's a couple of hints. BreweryYardRat Jun 2016 #179

Thank you for posting this! *hugs* I know exactly what you are GreenPartyVoter Jun 2016 #181

Keep going to the track as often as you can. Eventually you'll be doing it automatically GOLGO 13 Jun 2016 #185

Thank you for sharing. alarimer Jun 2016 #189

Fat shaming doesn't work for me, either KamaAina Jun 2016 #190