my mother is dying

[athena]

10. Not all mothers are good.

Those who think all mothers are good think that women are animals, not people. In reality, some mothers are just evil -- just as some fathers are evil. Some mothers don't love their children. Some mothers resent that they had children. Some mothers love their children but have issues they haven't resolved, and they dump those issues onto their children, either on purpose or unwittingly. It sounds like your mother is in that last category.

If your mother didn't give you enough love, it's not your fault, it's hers. Please don't blame yourself for it.

I don't have a loving relationship -- or any relationship, in fact -- with my mother, so I understand the pain. But it's not your fault. Let it go. Focus on yourself and your loved ones. Don't let anyone take that away from you.