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Mersky

(5,340 posts)

20. Oh Soph, if I lived near I'd come give you a hand

Sat Sep 12, 2020, 06:21 PM

Sep 2020

But, I’m an ocean away. Home health aides can truly be a life/sanity saver - give you a break from the bell (which is a smart method). You probably already know this, but hospice can be for just palliative care as one of my uncles with severe MS relies on as part of his care. Was difficult to get him to overcome the stigma, explained that it’s about keeping him as well as possible for as long as possible.

I read a couple weeks ago that you’re going through this, and didn’t know what to say. Have thought of y’all since. Hang in there, and find that nice thing to do for yourself everyday.

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This message was self-deleted by its author [View all] Soph0571 Sep 2020 OP

I'm sorry you are going through so much..... secondwind Sep 2020 #1

Oh my, Soph...I'm so sorry. cayugafalls Sep 2020 #2

First a giant Energy hug for you Tribalceltic Sep 2020 #3

I used a baby monitor. Reciever with battery power and a belt clip. Bell was crap idea here. IADEMO2004 Sep 2020 #12

At least you can still laugh! dawg day Sep 2020 #4

How awful for both of you! pandr32 Sep 2020 #5

Have you considered employing a care provider to help you out? demmiblue Sep 2020 #6

He has givers through a cancer charity Soph0571 Sep 2020 #10

You are a saint......a gawd send.....an angel......the best your SO could EVER have. a kennedy Sep 2020 #7

If you can, get hospice now wryter2000 Sep 2020 #8

I know you are right Soph0571 Sep 2020 #11

Dear Soph---Hospice is wonderful. They helped so much when my mother was very ill. When skylucy Sep 2020 #15

Hospice doesn't mean giving up on your loved one DeminPennswoods Sep 2020 #22

Absolutely right! Rebl2 Sep 2020 #52

I just saw this about giving up if hospice is called in. Absolutely not true. I have dealt with niyad Sep 2020 #31

I will reiterate what others in this subthread have stated Kali Sep 2020 #35

I promise you it does not mean you are giving up on him. Dem2theMax Sep 2020 #39

That's what Art Buchwald thought then he got better. grantcart Sep 2020 #48

I was a hospice nurse for years tavernier Sep 2020 #55

Soph0571, I am a cancer survivor & was in home hospice, (didn't know it, lol!) but I know SO The_REAL_Ecumenist Sep 2020 #62

Is there in-house hospice care available? Some hospices here in the US do in-home visits. nt tblue37 Sep 2020 #67

I'm so sorry - it might be time to get some help. The Velveteen Ocelot Sep 2020 #9

I was thinking tonight about paying for some home care Soph0571 Sep 2020 #13

Strength, dear heart! Sending courage. Guilded Lilly Sep 2020 #14

I'm so SO sorry! CaptainTruth Sep 2020 #16

If he is at that stage, he probably just wants you to be by his side. He maybe fearing his departure judesedit Sep 2020 #17

(((((((((((((Soph))))))))))))) all the hugs you can handle, from all of your DU family. We are here niyad Sep 2020 #18

You need help. barbtries Sep 2020 #19

Oh Soph, if I lived near I'd come give you a hand Mersky Sep 2020 #20

I wish words could help. BobTheSubgenius Sep 2020 #21

I forgot to add... BobTheSubgenius Sep 2020 #23

I'm so sorry for both you and your fella. fleur-de-lisa Sep 2020 #24

That is what you get for not having a whistler162 Sep 2020 #25

Your SO is so lucky to have you people Sep 2020 #26

Oh Sopp. It's so hard being a caretaker. Maraya1969 Sep 2020 #27

Dear Soph MLAA Sep 2020 #28

You've said it yourself: all this is too much. ancianita Sep 2020 #29

Damn! Please stay strong. warmfeet Sep 2020 #30

Oh wow Ohiogal Sep 2020 #32

... Silver Gaia Sep 2020 #33

Prayers/energy being sent for strength and comfort duhneece Sep 2020 #34

You are rising to a Herculean task. Gore1FL Sep 2020 #36

Oh Soph Star-Thrower Sep 2020 #37

So very sorry, Soph gademocrat7 Sep 2020 #38

I said a prayer. You are an angel. Joinfortmill Sep 2020 #40

Sending hugs Midnightwalk Sep 2020 #41

So sorry you & SO are having such a tough time SheltieLover Sep 2020 #42

Thoughts and energy hugs! paleotn Sep 2020 #43

I am so sorry. I've been there with both my parents but never as bad as it sounds for you. OregonBlue Sep 2020 #44

I've been there (and I have my own mobility problems and fear I am getting there) flotsam Sep 2020 #45

Sending strength and peace your way. yellerpup Sep 2020 #46

Take special care marieo1 Sep 2020 #47

Take special care marieo1 Sep 2020 #49

I'm so very sorry. You need help. I've been there and you will NOT be giving up on him if you call catbyte Sep 2020 #50

:hug: elleng Sep 2020 #51

After reading so many of your posts and responding to a few, my heart goes out to you and erronis Sep 2020 #53

Call the Hospice people, ask for help. TNNurse Sep 2020 #54

Reach out for trained care-giver help. You need it now. He needs it now. Hang in there. It sux. Evolve Dammit Sep 2020 #56

Over here there is option for "palliative care" as a step before hospice. But, as others have FailureToCommunicate Sep 2020 #57

... handmade34 Sep 2020 #58

I just wanted to mention something icky PennyK Sep 2020 #59

soph the bell might not be the worst idea.....is it possible to get in some home care for the dawn5651 Sep 2020 #60

Hugs to you both. sinkingfeeling Sep 2020 #61

Hugs to you both - sorry that you're having to go through this. GoneOffShore Sep 2020 #63

sending peace your way deek Sep 2020 #64

Get some help my friend Lifelong Protester Sep 2020 #65

Oh, Soph! I feel so sorry for you and your beloved. I wish things were easier for both of you. nt tblue37 Sep 2020 #66

Oh, dear Soph, I am so sorry for what you are going through. It is such a tough job for anybody, smirkymonkey Sep 2020 #68

Get help iamateacher Sep 2020 #69

So Sorry, Soph Cha Sep 2020 #70