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riderinthestorm

(23,272 posts)
17. Are you still religious or a believer in God?
Fri Dec 30, 2011, 04:20 PM
Dec 2011

(Obviously not your parents' religion anymore) but if you are still involved in any religion, you are going to be guilted into feeling like crap and fearful and anxious imho.

I stopped going to church as soon as I got to college. By the time I graduated I knew I was an unbeliever but didn't have enough courage in my fundie town to articulate my lack of faith out loud. By the time I was 25 I was an "out" atheist. I too had trouble leaving some parts behind but it was the religious conditioning parts like saying "thank god!" or bowing my head in prayer, even when I knew I wasn't going to pray. Or the bargaining with God - "please god if you just let this thing happen, I'll be a better believer...." Those parts of conditioned behavior took the longest to go away for me.

But the fear of eternal damnation or kharmic justice or god's punishment? As soon as I stopped trying so hard to have a relationship with God, all of that fear and anxiety stuff shedded off almost instantly. I honestly felt "free" the moment I stopped trying so damn hard to believe.

Sounds as though your fear and anxiety issues haven't resolved themselves but I'd guess that if you are still a believer, you are going to have issues with fear and anxiety. It's part of faith if you ask me. That whole "peace inside" crap that religions try to sell - its just a marketing ploy however with that said, if you are still a believer you should speak to your pastor/religious leader for some answers. If you are truly an atheist and are still wrestling with those demons, you need a counselor.

Good luck. ((((hug)))

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

I left my parents' religion when I was 20, and never looked back. CaliforniaPeggy Dec 2011 #1
Finding a competent, caring professional is one problem clyrc Dec 2011 #2
She should be reported. CaliforniaPeggy Dec 2011 #3
She retired this year clyrc Dec 2011 #4
I understand your loneliness... CaliforniaPeggy Dec 2011 #5
Didn't grow up in religion, so can't really help you there Duer 157099 Dec 2011 #6
I won't give up, but clyrc Dec 2011 #29
This is my way of bookmarking, clyrc. Suich Dec 2011 #7
18 y/o RainDog Dec 2011 #8
I have gotten good at talking myself out of thinking certain ways clyrc Dec 2011 #9
Do you have a "what if" thing going on? Tobin S. Dec 2011 #10
Sometimes, when I'm asleep clyrc Dec 2011 #30
patriarchal religion is, imo, harmful for females RainDog Dec 2011 #18
Grew up VERY Catholic. blueamy66 Dec 2011 #11
It was a gradual process for me wysimdnwyg Dec 2011 #12
Grew up Catholic, pretty much left the church 40 years ago rurallib Dec 2011 #13
Was a Southern Baptist as a child. RebelOne Dec 2011 #14
I was too. Neoma Dec 2011 #16
Well, probably since I was 13. Neoma Dec 2011 #15
Are you still religious or a believer in God? riderinthestorm Dec 2011 #17
I'm now an agnostic Unitarian Universalist clyrc Dec 2011 #31
It took me a few years Broken_Hero Dec 2011 #19
My mom rarely brings it up anymore clyrc Dec 2011 #32
Thats good, Broken_Hero Dec 2011 #42
I try to remember that my mom really is afraid I'm going to hell clyrc Dec 2011 #43
Well, I'm 57 and still struggle susanr516 Dec 2011 #20
Southern Baptist for me, too clyrc Dec 2011 #33
Religion = Pantload Arugula Latte Dec 2011 #21
That deserves an Amen! RueVoltaire Dec 2011 #22
I was brought up presbyterian. I liked the golden rule and the bible stories about applegrove Dec 2011 #23
I like the golden rule, too clyrc Dec 2011 #34
I don't remember much about Sunday School. So I read the harrowing old testament as an adult. applegrove Dec 2011 #48
It isn't all negative clyrc Dec 2011 #51
We were presbyterians. We didn't get the hellfire sermons. I could well imagine those would be applegrove Dec 2011 #53
Be glad you missed out on those clyrc Dec 2011 #55
What got me on the path out was actually doing one of my high school resolutions eridani Dec 2011 #24
I try to keep the good things, too clyrc Dec 2011 #36
Maybe you don't have to totally reject it Generic Brad Dec 2011 #25
I do that, but I hate the way the stuff I rejected lingers clyrc Dec 2011 #37
Raised and confirmed Catholic, I left gradually. I don't think closeupready Dec 2011 #26
True enough clyrc Dec 2011 #38
You think too much about it. Curmudgeoness Dec 2011 #27
If you think about "take what you want, and then pay for it" clyrc Dec 2011 #39
Try thinking about it this way: PassingFair Dec 2011 #28
That made sense to me 24 years ago clyrc Dec 2011 #40
Honestly? It took one moment. One action. One death that will never make sense... ScreamingMeemie Dec 2011 #35
I can see how that would wipe it all out clyrc Dec 2011 #41
Independent, Fundamental, Bible-Believing Baptist OriginalGeek Dec 2011 #44
I stopped going to church at around 20, never considered myself an athiest until about 40. deucemagnet Dec 2011 #45
I can't make the leap to athiest, and I'm not church free clyrc Dec 2011 #46
Have you tried the Quakers? PassingFair Dec 2011 #47
I have a friend who is a Quaker, but no meeting house here clyrc Dec 2011 #49
Well, that certainly narrows your options! PassingFair Dec 2011 #50
There are some of us who just don't care enough to label ourselves. ScreamingMeemie Dec 2011 #52
I've tried being a realist clyrc Dec 2011 #54
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