Not all of our mothers were wonderful.

[athena]

34. I think it's sexist and patronizing.

I actually feel offended when someone wishes me a happy mother's day. The best way to respond to it is to immediately say, "I'm not a mother." And when they say, "Oh, I'm sorry," say, "Why? I'm not sorry!" (I didn't think to respond this way when it happened to me; the first time it happens, you're just surprised and don't know what to say.)

I believe that Mother's Day is society's way of keeping women in our place. It wasn't intended that way by the person who came up with the idea, but patriarchy embraced it. They give women crumbs to keep us satisfied while keeping the main part of the loaf for men.

I agree with everything you wrote. I had a narcissistic mother and decided early on that I wouldn't put anyone through what my mother put me through. As much as people say they had horrible parents and knew to be better parents themselves, the reality is that people tend to repeat the patterns from their childhood. The child of a narcissist tends to be a bad parent. It takes years of therapy to get over that kind of abuse, and most people have children before they have even begun to process the abuse they have been through.

I've never liked children. I'm glad I chose to live my life for myself rather than to sacrifice it for the patriarchy. And I'm delighted to see that I'm not the only one.