lots and lots of therapy.
For years, I labored under the impression that I was a rotten person because I dared to have sex before I got married, am on my third marriage and had the temerity to move across the country. My dad is no prize either, but at least you always knew where you stood with him. My mom is the queen of the silent treatment, not to mention passive/aggressiveness.
She's a Christian, but the type that uses it as a weapon. So to her, I'm the whore of Babylon.
She told me I "must be antisocial" when I was being picked on and ostracized at school. I was six years old.
She always found a way to run down/belittle everything I did. Since her temper wasn't as monstrous as my dad's, I always thought she was the good guy.
It's only after a lot of perspective and therapy to realize that she's a very angry woman and probably resentful of me for doing what she felt she couldn't--escape a rotten marriage.
I hate both Mother's Day and Father's Day. I was a glorified farmhand, not a loved child.
And now it's compounded by everyone assuming I'm a mom, too. That's a whole 'nother post.
Hugs. 
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