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Texas

In reply to the discussion: Veterans kicked out of bar [View all]

Ilsa

(61,675 posts)
9. Dear TxT, I' m sorry you are dealing with so much. I read your
Tue Feb 26, 2013, 01:29 PM
Feb 2013

post here and on the Oscars thread. I guess I'll offer some advice. Its free, so i guess it isnt worth much. Here goes:

It sounds like, professionally, you need either retraining or a new certification to expand your job possibilities. Do you have any of your unemployment saved to spend on training? Are you receiving severance that you could use to pay for new skills? Most well-paying jobs that I am familiar with require the individual to almost constantly keep learning and upgrading their skill set, either as a license requirement or because it is imperative for the job.

Also, have you searched nationally? Internationally? I understand the temptation to stay close to friends, but if they are unable to provide you with financial support, you will need to set out on your own. You cant forego your own needs to be near friends. New friends can be made, even better than the old ones. You might even be able to hook up with DUers in a new city. And let's face it: Texas is awful for helping anyone other than the rich and corporations. I've read here on DU that there are blue states that are more generous in helping folks get back on their feet, but I'm not certain which areas are best.

All of that being said, it sounds like you are in a tight spot. You may need to take a job that doesn't pay anywhere near what you were paid before, much less only 25% less. But, if you earn enough to get by on, it may provide you with 1) the means to get away from your brother and recover from that awful situation, 2) the time you need for the economy to turn around and retrain or re-work your career. At minimum, by contributing to the household bills or your own upkeep, it will empower you emotionally and eliminate your roommate-brother's excuse for hassling or abusing you. Plus, you'll be engaging with other people. The socialization from work might help with the depression. And even part time work will show a potential future employer that you have ambition.

You might get some opinions on this from DU. I'm certainly not familiar with the sectors of the national job market. You might ask DUers what to expect in finding new work, where the best options are, etc. I've read accounts of DUers working part time and lower-skilled jobs to get by and keep themselves fed and sheltered until a better, permanent gig comes along. You might also ask about what social benefits they've used that were helpful. I know that if I needed foodstamps or Medicaid, I'd gladly endure a two hour trip with Satan to get the benefits if they are available.

Also, I know nurses who warned me about GCMC ages ago. Awful place. Sounds like they have been managed poorly. And if your brother has been shifted to PRN, then he's lost his medical benefits. Sounds like he's under a lot of stress, too, which he takes out on you. At PRN, he may be worried that an application for a VA loan would be turned down or that he would default. If he may have to move for work, then he absolutely should not incur a mortgage or any loan obligation. I don't think anyone would fault him for that. You both would probably be better off liquidating the property.

I hope it works out for you. Hang in there; don't give up on yourself.

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