How to Identify a Homosexual, According to a 1980 CIA Memo [View all]

In 1980, the CIA released a three-page memorandum on how to identify homosexuals during investigations in order to blackmail them. As you might have guessed, this CIA memo is hilarious.

So if you’re having trouble with your gaydar, don’t worry. The most brilliant criminal investigators in the United States have you covered.

1. Know that it won’t be easy.

“One of the most common mistakes made by the average person is the conviction that he can recognize a homosexual on sight. This is similar to recognizing a communist,” the CIA memo explains. Alas, homosexuals do not have special birthmarks or tattoos.

The memo adds, “Very few employees come to work wearing eye makeup or ‘My Sin.’”

2. He’s a good worker.

“The homosexual subject is usually regarded as an above-average employee,” the memo continues. “His work habits are good, he is punctual, responsive to authority, cooperative, friendly, a credit to the organization.”

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