Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News Editorials & Other Articles General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

onager

(9,356 posts)
9. 2 alternative histories...
Fri Jan 27, 2012, 02:33 AM
Jan 2012

Both from the fun book What If #2:

1. Jerusalem, 33 CE - ignoring a hostile crowd screaming for blood, Pontius Pilate pardons Jesus Christ. Jesus returns home, under the protection of Roman soldiers.

The Romans decide they LIKE this kind of religious leader - he tells people to forgive their enemies and even to pay their taxes! What a guy!

Even though he is still around and presumably the Subject Matter Expert, Jesus lives long enough to see the religion he founded degenerate into innumerable squabbling sects. All claiming to be the Real Xians, of course. Jesus dies at the age of 90, blind and senile.

By then the Roman Emperor takes his title of Pontiff Maximus seriously. He becomes the Emperor-Pope, leader of the One True Xian Church, and ruthlessly cracks down on any hint of heresy or schism.

The Roman Army marches with a convert-or-kill mentality, always accompanied by a sub-army of aggressive Xian missionaries.

On the Roman borders the upstart sect of Islam pops up and is quickly exterminated, becoming a footnote in history.

By the 15th century, word spreads of new lands, across the oceans far to the west. They too will soon become part of the Holy Roman Empire...the REAL one.

2. Actium, 31 BCE - the naval forces of Cleopatra and Marc Antony defeat Octavian. Alexandria, Egypt, becomes the political, educational and religious center of the world.

Earlier members of the Ptolemy family were religiously very...flexible. Ptolemy I let himself be named "Pharoah," even though he was about as Egyptian as Liz Taylor and probably laughed at the whole idea in private.

The Ptolemies invented their own god, Serapis, and saw it spread far beyond Egypt. By the mid-First Century CE, Egypt is ruled by Caesarion - the son of Cleopatra and Julius Caesar. Who, following Ptolemaic practice, married his half-sister Selene - the daughter of Cleopatra and Marc Antony. IOW, one damn formidable family.

They hear of some useful new religious ideas percolating just over the Sinai border, in Palestine. So useful that they convert, as do all their citizens (except for Alexandria's thriving Jewish community, which all rulers had the good sense to leave in peace).

And the world sees the formation of...The First Church of Jesus Christ - Alexandria.


Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

I pretty much agree. But the problem with "What if...?" ... immoderate Jan 2012 #1
The world would be a better place without a lot of things. cleanhippie Jan 2012 #2
Provocative question, speaks more to the history of humankind than to... MarkCharles Jan 2012 #3
What's the magic of Christianity AlbertCat Jan 2012 #17
Adoption by the later Roman Empire? FiveGoodMen Jan 2012 #18
As far as I am concerned, most religions are equally un-magical. Or maybe.. MarkCharles Jan 2012 #20
Without. Deep13 Jan 2012 #4
Oh I agree - it can be very evil Taverner Jan 2012 #7
Hard to imagine one worse than Christianity. nt Deep13 Jan 2012 #8
At the risk of fatwa, I would say Islam does... Taverner Jan 2012 #16
Can be, but only because Christianity is weakened... Deep13 Jan 2012 #21
The core doctrine of many religions is evil. They never expected it to go so far. Taverner Jan 2012 #22
agreed. ChairmanAgnostic Jan 2012 #13
I vote "Without" too. BiggJawn Jan 2012 #5
By "better," do you mean more promiscuous? ZombieHorde Jan 2012 #6
2 alternative histories... onager Jan 2012 #9
Or a third.... Taverner Jan 2012 #15
It would be better (saner) without all religion, mr blur Jan 2012 #10
I say without and (without going into many ideas on the thought), is the fact that each person... BlueJazz Jan 2012 #11
+1. I was going to say personal responsibility. PassingFair Jan 2012 #12
Come on. You would be taking away a shitload of material from stand up comedians! HopeHoops Jan 2012 #14
Well, if it HADN'T existed way back when.... AlbertCat Jan 2012 #19
Kick. iris27 Mar 2012 #23
Latest Discussions»Alliance Forums»Atheists & Agnostics»Would the world be better...»Reply #9