What Men Say About Women When They Think You've Never Been One

[seabeyond]

14. ok, so i am good. and right. i listened to the interview

very interesting. of course, i cannot retain all. but people should listen to this woman.

she mentions how gender is in the brain, almost suggesting the difference of gender, but in all her conversation of gender difference it is clearly conditioned in us. emotion. this was fun. along with the fetus thread i did, being girl and kicked into boy. the boy has the emotion like a girl and it is punched, kicked, repressed out of him. tones.... the high pitched, excitement and words, again conditioned out of the boy. tramp down. my 14 yr old son the other day said something to me like.... this is so sweet, you will like it. i immediately got a huge grin and hugged him and said, "my boy, at 14 still uses the word sweet. no self respecting 14 yr old boy would ever use the word sweet. i love you so......" he is good not to worrying about that. totally secure in his "manliness". speaks from emotional self if he wants, and is accepted by friends..... oldest son and i dont know how he gets away with it, but he does and is well received.

the mouthy, sexist, denigrating talk is bluster. to cover up the high esteem for women, that he has to cover for his buddies. or to hide the vulnerability of perceived power a woman has in their life or a hurt. this is what i have always seen and felt from men (boys havent really learned it yet, they still express the vulnerability or hurt or humiliation). that is why when men "perform" for us on du, i dont think they realize that it is a huge spotlight shined on them exactly what they are really saying for all of us to see. the very thing they are hiding is being highlighted and shouted out.

the direct manner and few words. this is another where she seems to be saying is in the brain, that i contend is conditioning. i have two boys that talk, a lot. i have two brothers and a father that talk, a lot. (maybe not with other men, but certainly with me. so still well within their ability. which she did not touch on). the privilege of ability to demand, with few words. her discussion that women ought to pick this up. the problem here, is this is how i talk. when i talk this way with men, they get pissed. i am the b*****. they cant handle it. they say women use too many words. shorten the amount of words. talk like a man, and watch the reaction. women are conditioned and made to talk all nicey, tippy toeing and if they dont, they are attacked. they are not listened to or well received if talking like a man and certain not heard. shut out.

heterosexual manhood much more limited. i realized this in so many ways, but she allowed me to see it even beyond wht i knew, which is a nifty and interesting insight.

then the conclusion of gender false concept and trying to have to live up to the role.

all very good stuff and fun. thank you for this madras....