westerebus
westerebus's JournalReturning a gesture (of kindness) brings understanding.
That's the reason I shared the story of my mother's people. I was raised as as a Irish Catholic. It wasn't until I was fourteen that I had any idea I was anything else but. I was eighteen when my mother told me the rest of the story of her life before marrying.
She was orphaned thought she knew both her parents. She knew she was Jewish as a child.
She was essentially an indentured servant of the family who adopted her.
The kindness Bob showed me set an example for me in how to make a connection with people.
He wasn't kind because he was gay, he was kind because he was a good man. Just like you.
When Ops come out with SWM as the lowest setting in the game of life or how white people or straight people don't get what it means to be discriminated against or what poverty is and that pointing out they do get it, gets calls of covert racism, overt bigotry, homophobia, trolling, and a need for self examination...what does that say about us?
I might be wrong, but given the history of the wars on DU, there will be those who will claim this post is a whine about the poor menz feh-fehs.
Yet, you managed to share your perceptions of life as a gay man here ( of all places the dreaded Men's Group ) without any one bashing you or questioning your integrity, self worth or motives.
I appreciate that kindness. Of you and every one who responded to you here.
First I'm rec'ing this OP.
Second I'm sending you and your future spouse my very best wishes.
Third this SWM is glad to know you and to hear your voice.
My Irish grandmother on my father's side, Betty worked as a switchboard operator for a hotel. My paternal grandfather died at age 40. Betty worked two jobs to raise her two sons.
The man she called her best friend was Bob, a gay man.
My high school was not that far from the hotel. Once a week I'd stop by to see Nana.
Bob would always order me a drink from the bar, a coke in a rocks glass with ice. It's what as the concierge, he did for the hotel guests.
That's the kind of man he was.
I never got to met my maternal grandmother or grandfather. Her maiden name on my mother's birth certificate is marked unknown. She died when my mother was eight.
Her father adopted out her and her sister to different families. It was the depression and he was a poor Jew. The family she grew up in were German Lutheran. Her maiden name is theirs on all official records.
Her grandparents left Russia via Poland where they were baptized in order to get passports into this country. The pogroms were the reason they left Russia.
My mother and her sister were reunited when I was fourteen. I had an aunt and cousins I'd never seen.
I can not see what the world looks like through your eyes.
My wish for you and yours is that it be a better one.
It is all about the hokey pokey.
Cui bono, I'm not under attack.
I don't think you are either.
I do think, as others have said, there might be a more positive means of introduction.
That is not a criticism of the message or the messenger.
Many think the introduction is justified and like you, said so.
It is a disagreement on who in the audience has a difference take on what it means to them.
Separate from this is the message of the Op.
I don't think anyone here condones the murder of innocent persons.
I think we agree on this.
I think everyone here on DU wants an end to the violence.
I think we agree on this too.
How do we change this?
Good question, if I do say so myself.
I don't have that answer.
I can tell you what I do know.
I know my white privilege helped fund the the democratic platform here in Virginia.
That is what my privilege does.
Can you sing: Ding Dong the cooch is gone!
A family member is a very happy camper.
Which makes me just as happy.
On that positive note, I'll say good night.
I'm glad you are able to express yourself honestly.
And I don't think you're directing any of your frustration concerning the responses in the OP at me personally. If you felt that I was being hostile that wasn't my intent.
The Op's content was well done. I did not offer any criticism of the message or of the body of the work. It's a message people need to hear.
I haven't asked for a rewrite. And no, you're not wasting my time either.
I hope I'm not wasting yours.
Black Lives Matter
The editors that decided that that would be the title, thought very carefully on how to reach the most people given a subject which is so emotionally charged. As you say: "the message will be difficult for many no matter how it is parsed".
As many here have pointed out to me that just because I don't see it that doesn't mean it doesn't exist. The reference being to racism. I thought I had made that clear in what I posted. I know that racism exists. That was apparently missed by some.
That isn't that important, that my view was glossed over, but how it was so easy to miss what I said not once, but three times.
I think it's a discussion we can have. I'll leave it up to you to decide if you want to.
Please pm me if you wish.
Thanks for your time.
How do we change that?
What in your mind would make white people pay more attention to the issues of the black community. I can't speak for the black community that's not my place.
Neither am I a spokesperson for the white community. I am one person. I'm fortunate to never have lived or worked in a segregated community. But living and working in the community does not mean my experience will be the same as a person of color.
It would be offensive of me to even attempt to tell a black person how they might feel.
The best I can do is say to the message comes off as insinuating white people on DU do not know or care or support those they call friend, family or partner. It is not a message I would use to engage my target audience.
If that audience is the progressive white people that do support the black community, it is just not helpful. The push back helps no one. It divides the community that can and does come together in mutual support.
That doesn't mean we need to agree each step of the way. I don't think that will ever happen. We may fight like brothers and sisters do, there is plenty of that, yet we come to each others side to fight a common foe that threatens each of us and those we care for.
We are not close to ending racism here in America, rose colored glasses aside. There is much work to be done. Bigotry did not end when President Obama was elected. It did come a lot closer to the surface when the Tea Party (aka the Klan) showed up on the doorstep.
I don't see support for them here on DU. I see people calling for progressive candidates to take them on. I see the community on DU demanding a progressive agenda and working in that direction.
I see a demand for justice and equality.
I think that's why you and I are here in the first place.
But, I can not see through your eyes.
Thanks for listening.
Yes it does.
There is plenty of racism in America.
As I look down this OP all I see are People who would condemn racism in any form.
Some of them are white. Some are people of color.
I do not see anyone here on DU promoting racism.
No. It is a call out.
There is an American culture.
That culture includes people of all colors.
Progressive people understand that we are in this together, cooperating to build a better world.
Is it that you think white people who here at DU are to stupid to understand that concept?
Or that white people here on DU are unaware that racism exists?
Or that white people on DU do not support the black community?
Or that white people here on DU are just racists in general?
If that's not what you think, then you won't be offended as it's not about you.
As goes the QE so goes the markets.
Poor china less and less low cost dollars, so they print more and more Yuan.
Has anyone noticed Mr Soros has been quiet re the unbalancing of the Turkish Lira.
May be I haven't been paying attention.
Then there's the POTUS and the TPP.
I was looking at the map and thought, if I wanted to ensure certain choke points or ports of call were on friendly terms with our consumer base in a quid pro quo, it makes sense in one sense. Not that we would ever deny a Asian power access to the right of way of the high seas.
This brings me to look at Myanmar. Out of the prison of military dictatorship just in time to possibly become the next Asian miracle? Did the pipeline on its coast into south China provide an incentive to open up as the Pakistan pipeline might not be Taliban proof?
The end of the 1972 bear market. Take a Google if you like gold history.
The Munich massacre was a 1972 event just for perspective.
Grammar, not semantics.
"so much" is a modifier of "hated" not of "in the south".
I'm from NJ and have lived in Virginia for twenty years.
All I can say is from my experience, you have judged many good people harshly.
The case is true that some people only see the man's skin color.
It really has nothing to do with geography.
Those slave owning white men of the 18th century in the south included gun owners and bible owners George Washington and Thomas Jefferson.
History has many strange bedfellows.
And they have slept just about everywhere.
Profile Information
Gender: MaleHometown: Virginia
Member since: Wed Oct 19, 2005, 05:52 PM
Number of posts: 2,976
